The Urban Dictionary is not exactly a reliable source of grammatic excellence.
It is described even by itself as being a ‘crowd-sourced on-line dictionary of slang words and phrases formed in 1998 as a parody of dictionary.com and vocabulary.com’
And it was established not by any world-acclaimed literary critics but by a US college freshman.
But if Round 12 of the Toyota AFL season is any sort of guide, the Urban Dictionary is right on the money.
Why? Because the website describes the word ‘Dayne’ as “a perfect male specimen, adorable in every respect”.
Certainly, Brisbane Lions coach Chris Fagan isn’t going to argue after his pair of Daynes put on an a magnificent display on Saturday to spearhead a superb 57-point win over Fremantle at the Gabba.
Captain Dayne Beams and deputy vice-captain Dayne Zorko combined for 66 possessions, including 30 contested possessions, 19 clearances, 13 tackles and three goals as the Lions ended a nine-game losing streak.
It was the fourth longest losing streak in combined Bears/Lions history, behind the Lions’ 12 losses in a row in 2016, the Bears’ 12 losses in a row in 1990-91, and the Lions’ 11 losses in a row in 2015.
Almost single-handedly, the two ‘perfect specimens’ ensured that it wasn’t going to last any longer.
The Lions, coming off a bye, went into the game full of confidence against a Dockers side which was on a six-day break and had made the longest trip in the game from Perth to Brisbane.
It surprised nobody inside the home team camp that they won, but it’s hard to see how anyone could have foreseen the ease with which the bottom-placed Lions dispensed with the eighth-placed Dockers, who arrived in town with a 6-5 win/loss record.
Zorko quickly dispensed with any self-doubt in the home side with an exhilarating first quarter, and finished with 30 possessions (14 contested), six marks, a game-high 10 clearances, five tackles and two goals.
Beams, growing in stature as a captain with every outing, worked into the game more slowly but by the end of the game had even more impact than his namesake.
The skipper finished with a game-high 36 possessions (game-high 16 contested), five marks, nine clearances, a game-high nine tackles and one goal.
Between them the super-Daynes had 15& of the Lions’ possessions, 20% of contested possessions, 41% of clearances, 20% of tackles and 17% of goals.
Zorko earned 129 Champion Data ranking points – his ninth 100-point score of the season.
Beams, who has played two less games, had a season-high 146 ranking points and his sixth ton.
The Beams’ tally was the fourth-highest by a Queenslander this year behind Charlie Dixon’s 167 in Round 11, Nick Riewoldt’s 161 in Round 3 and Dixon’s 151 in Round 6.
In his last three games Beams has averaged 135.0 ranking points with scores of 132-127-146 to rank fourth in the League behind Patrick Dangerfield (154.3), Dustin Martin (144.7) and Joel Selwood (137.0) in the same period.
Harris Andrews, another member of the Lions’ leadership group, also had a good afternoon against the Dockers with 19 possessions, a game-high 11 marks and 80 Champion Data points.
Also for the Lions, Archie Smith had 13 possessions and 12 hit-outs in his second game of the year, and Eric Hipwood eight possessions and a goal.
For the Dockers, Lee Spurr had 21 possessions and Lachie Weller 11 possessions and one goal.
The Lions’ win was only one half of a big weekend for Queensland football, with the Gold Coast Suns pulling off a stunning 16-point win over Hawthorn at the MCG.
It was only the eighth time since the Suns entered the competition in 2011 that the Lions and the Suns have won on the same weekend, and only the second time since Round 19 2014.
It was also only the second time the Suns have played away in the two-win weekend for the Queensland teams.
The other time was in Round 5 2013, when the Suns beat GWS by 44 points in Canberra and the Lions beat Melbourne by 28 points at the Gabba.
There wasn’t the same Queensland contribution to the Suns’ win, though, with Jesse Joyce (17 possessions) and Alex Sexton (12 possessions) the only homegrown players.
Also in Round 12, Sam Gilbert had 19 possessions in St.Kilda’s loss to Adelaide, Brendan Whitecross 13 possessions for Hawthorn against Gold Coast, and Charlie Dixon seven possessions in Port Adelaide’s surprise loss to Essendon.
Sam Reid had 11 possessions in GWS’ shock one-point loss to Carlton – his first loss in GWS colors since Round 15 2013 after 15 consecutive wins.
Josh Smith had 12 possessions for Collingwood in their Queen’s Birthday loss to Melbourne.
In the NEAFL, Claye Beams returned from injury in good fashion, collecting 28 possessions and a team-high five tackles to rank among his team’s best in a high-quality five-point win over the Suns at Brendale.
Jono Freeman (four goals) also ranked among the Lions’ best, while Tom Bell had 29 possessions.
In Sydney, Kurt Tippett, dropped from the Sydney AFL side, enjoyed some much-needed ground time with and picked up some good touch with 21 possessions, nine marks, 28 hit-outs and three goals against the Giants. Aliir Aliir, too, was a good contender with 23 possessions in the Swans big win.
The game, in which a Sydney side with 20 listed players demolished a GWS side with just eight listed players 28-17 (185) to 2-2 (14), saw a bizarre occurrence in the third quarter.
When officials called for a headcount the Giants were found to have one extra player on the ground, meaning that their entire score at the time was wiped.
It made no difference – at the time the Giants had only scored four behinds.
In the VFL, Melbourne’s Josh Wagner, dropped for Monday’s clash with the Pies, pushed for an immediate return when best afield for Casey in a 13-point win over Collingwood.
Jake Spencer also made a successful return from injury for Casey, while Lachie Keeffe had his best game of the season for the Pies to join Josh Thomas in pressing for a senior call-up.
St.Kilda’s Tom Hickey played his second game back from injury for Sandringham.
Geelong’s Wylie Buzza, in excellent recent form and pushing for an AFL debut this weekend in the absence of the suspended Tom Hawkins, was denied a chance to press his claims when the Cats had a VFL bye.
By Peter Blucher